The Journey aka Goldilocks and the 3(0) houses

Before I dive into a full on update/progress report on the face lift taking place at The Yellow House, I figure I would give you a taste of our roller coaster adventure in house hunting; the good, the bad and the ugly.  I know this list seems massive, but I really is just a sampling; I wish I could say this is the complete list of houses we saw during our year+ house search.  

For reference, here was our unbudgeable Wish List:
21093 or 21030 zip code - Not only did I insist on being within a stone's throw of my padres, it was also imperative to be in either of these zip codes for both re-sale and as a security blanket in case we were unable to send future kiddos to private school- a strong school district was a must.  (When the going got tough, we branched out and looked into Mt. Washington.  If we were going to pay city taxes, and serve on city juries, this was the only neighborhood I would consider.  Great Schools.  Diverse Population.  Strong Sense of Community. Most Suburban of the City Neighborhoods.  
Entrance - I'm not talking about some grand foyer ala Metty and Joe (see below), but I didn't want the front door to open up into a family room.

A Fall Feast in the Foyer

The Foyer in its Finest Form

At least 2.5 Bathrooms -  A 1st floor powder room was a must.  We entertain frequently and I didn't want guests to have to share a future kids bathroom.  Nor did I want to share a bathroom with future kids.
At least 3 Bedrooms - 4 would be ideal and/or bonus rooms for office space
Sizable Kitchen - It didn't mater if the kitchen was upgraded or not, but the footprint needed to be workable. (Really it would be in our best interest if it wasn't because it would keep price down and then when we had the moolah to reno we could have our dream kitchen.) 
Formal Dining Room
Basement
Garage -  Where were we going to store kayaks and future kiddos' bikes?
LAND!!!  -  I wanted at least an acre; this would allow privacy (ie: minimal neighbors) and room for Brooksy to romp. Tim wanted "mega" land for a chicken coop and hunting.

The "Your Delusional House"

At this stage in the game at The Yellow House, my delusions are even more apparent as I am 100% "OVER" the cosmetic changes we are currently making.  For all intensive purposes, the house was move in ready; we just wanted to remove wallpaper, slap on a fresh coat of paint, install new carpeting upstairs and  do some much needed landscaping (read, I'm pretty sure the leaves covering the lawn are over a year old as well as the dead mums in the flower beds.)  Really just "neutralizing" the house and getting a clean base to work with.  'Before' and 'After' pictures to follow to showcase all the colors of the rainbow that were previously in our house.

Ivy Hill

Geesh, I've already digressed and I'm only one deep.  Ok, so the "Your Delusional House."  I would say this was the very first house Tim and I were seriously interested in and in retrospect, I would say it is in the company of maybe 4 total houses we had "extended" conversations on.   (This includes our beloved Yellow House, which is actually the only house we put an offer on.  If only the process was as simple as that statement.)  We went on 3 official appointments and countless clandestine drive-bys. We even brought one of my friends/co-workers who used to be a contractor to help us "strategize."  And yes, that is where the "your delusional" part comes from and yes, if you are hearing those words being said by none other than Miss Metty you would be 100% spot on.  

This house had a much desired Ivy Hill address and was owned by descendants of the Cockey family; one of THE nicest, sweetest couples I've ever met.  Cockey does equate to Cockeysville. (Take a detour on Wikipedia if you want to learn more.)  The property was gorgeous!  A 6 acre hidden oasis.  My vegetarian turned hunter husband was obsessed.  The pièce de résistance was the most idyllic stream that traversed through the grounds.  I immediately thought of all stream walking we could do with future kiddos (hey, this was a much beloved past time when I attended Montessori school,) the pick-up football games in the huge expanse of a backyard, and the great parties we would throw on the deck.  Tim's brain immediately imagined riding his John Deere with the ever important cup holder, shooting some bucks and plopping a beach chair in the stream with his barefeet in the water listening to Orioles games on the radio, guns a blazing.  (No, not those kind.  Although given his hobby of choice I understand if you went there.) While those were his immediate thoughts, he too was excited about exploring the stream and surrounding property (we were also within walking distance to Oregon Ridge) with kids too, but collecting and cataloging various types of larvae with them didn't really get his motor running.  To each his own.  

Field of Dreams

Montessori Flashback

Notice that in what was supposed to be a description of a house, there has been nary a mention of 4 walls and roof? Well, that is because the house needed a lot of work.  Not to say there weren't some really lovely attributes: the screened in porch, the bay window in the formal seating area, the vibrant Japanese maple... whoops, the great outdoors again.

Majestic Maple

Bay Window to the Great Outdoors

Basically, I was ready to go full Property Brothers, Nicole Curtis or any other HGTV star up to to this daunting task on this house.  I mean I was talking about tearing down exterior walls like it was a trip to the grocery store.   I was even all in to live on-site through the reno.  My mother was in full on panic mode with my lofty ideas. (I'm pretty sure raising the ceiling height/ie. altering the roof was discussed as well.)

In retrospect, I have no idea what I was thinking or where I thought the money to fund this project was coming from. Money in this case also includes the massive amounts of therapy I would have needed to cope with the stress of the project.  Now don't get me wrong, despite the cautionary tales of renovating a house, I still totally think Tim and I would be up to that task, but what is abundantly clear is that is was not the house for that project.  The footprint of the house was just not what we were looking for.  We often joke about our 80lb, clumsy sounds like a Clysdale when he runs down stairs dog navigate the narrow hallways.  Visual image: a pinball machine.

This house also taught me how desirable new and top of the line water heater, etc are and as well as well maintained with the accompanying service records.  

The "Dickens Christmas" House 

Gah, this house was gorg!  (Gorg = a step up from gorgeous; justifiably oozing with every inch of Vogue magazine, New England style airs that undoubtedly slap you in the face when you hear this word.) I have visions of sugarplums just thinking about it.  It sat on top a hill in the most regal and majestic way and beckoned from a bygone era.  My entire family could see the beautiful front porch bespoke in garland and Christmas revelry.  Alas, the bones of this home were killer as were the grounds, but the house just felt too formal and too small.  there was no basement, and lord knows we have a lot of crap, and there wasn't enough room for a future family to just chill and splay out.   Really, the major deal breaker... 1.5 baths.  Ouch!

The "All-Garage" House

I'm pretty sure the 3-car detached garage was bigger than the house itself!  It was huge and even had an upstairs which would have been so dope as office space for Tim and I's yet declared screen printing, design, event planning business. This was one of our early house visits and the first of many times my mom had to remind us that you don't buy a house for the outdoor space which is only viable for use 50% of the year and is actually in use for far less.  That being said, there were killer gardens and patio/pool area.  I mean killer.  And a pool is such a bonus.  (Despite the maintenance fees.)  It was by no means on our list of items we wanted, but each time we saw one we just got so caught up in the fact we wouldn't have to join a swim club and had another source of "free" at home entertainment once homeowners inevitably pillaged our once plush fun money budgets.  Pretty sure Metty's go to line became, "so are you going to brush your teeth by the pool in November?"  Touché, mom, touché.  

It should be noted, the master bathroom was teensy.  We knew from the lack of pictures online it was going to be rough especially as it was described as updated.  (Who doesn't want to flaunt an updated master bathroom?)  You could barely turn around in there and you'd be lucky to fit a toothbrush on the sink.  Literally.  Another major concern was that it was situated right off of a busy streets notorious for speeders (myself included; mom/dad, if you are reading this not me.)  My parents and our realtor, Nancy, were fixated on the telephone post next to the driveway that was clearly reinforced from people hitting it on multiple occasions.  Next.

The "I've Never Seen It, But KNOW It's My Dream House" House

Labrador Lane is THE ideal, most perfect, adorable, desirable location to lay down some roots.  I mean the name even sounds straight out of Leave it to Beaver.  Great school district, off the falls road corridor which means quick and easy access to 83, 695, Grauls, shops/restaurants and most importantly a hop skip and a jump from Chez Metty and Joe.  The neighborhood is having a lot of turn around and bringing in younger families such as ourselves and most of the houses have at least 3/4 of an acre.  There were a couple of houses we we were interested in in this development, but the true pull was its Grand Dame.  I still salivate over this house.  From the pictures, it was perfection. I'd say it was as close to our dream home as you can get and I'm going to go out on a limb and conjecture in person it wouldn't have disappointed.  It was also priced over $600K and well our budget was not that.  It's funny, I wrote this post in secret before things were official with the Yellow House and I referred to this house as the one that got away that I never really had.  Well it is true I never had this house, but even looking at the pictures again I don't feel those same pangs nor like I'm missing out on anything.  Growth, people.  Growth.

The "You Want How Much" House

I really wanted to call this the "Racist Wallpaper" house, but I didn't and that is all I have to say about that. There is an interesting story to this house as we got an insider's tip and were able to see it in its pre-rehab condition.  It was another old house with so much potential.  Potential is code for beaucoup dollars and work.  (Also, I'm pretty sure this was the only time taking down an exterior wall was my mom's idea.)  Amazing bones albeit not enough cozy family space.  No, the really awesome (outdoor) side porch does not count.  See how I'm self-editing, mom?

Side Porch From a Bygone Era

The house sold and less than 4 months later was back on the market for an additional $200k aka a whopping 40% increase!!  Being the nosy, err savvy consumers, we are we decided to take a look.  I was pissed!  This was the shoddiest quick fixer upper I've ever seen.  I'm pretty sure Chip and Joanna would be furious I even used the term fixer upper in relation to this property.  The kitchen, which in our opinion needed to be much larger, was given the appearance of being opened up by taking down the dividing wall to the formal dining room. (Location of now freed racist wallpaper.  Pun intended.)  No square footage was added, if anything space was lost due to the oversize island they put in that required you to alter your natural walking path once you entered the kitchen from the garage.  Even with an island there was no storage space.  

The materials they used had 'stock from your huge warehouse supply' written all over them it was borderline disrespectful.  This house was so unique (modeled after a colonial with a tin roof and all) and could have been so special.  The paint was sloppy, the staged furniture was dusty, and there were dead bugs in toilets and window sills. You want how much?!?   All houses, that you actually want to sell, when placed on the market should be presented with love and care, but a house that supposedly underwent massive renovations should be top notch.  At least try a little harder to fool me that you didn't just slap shhhh, err crap, together.  (I haven't decided if this was a family blog yet.)  The listing agent had the audacity to explain, "the house was a great starting point for someone to come in and put there stamp on it."  Um exsqueeze me?!?!  You did all this work, are charging me some inane amount for materials I know you bought bulk and used in your 50 other spec homes just for someone to come in and be able to have a vision and redo it all?  I don't know why I felt so personally affronted by this display, but I did. I wish the ever popular "Bye Felicia" were in rotation when we saw this house because that is what j would have said to her.  Instead, I sent her a "helpful" email with my observations.  I also suggested they should have done the basic updates (plumping, electrical, repairs) and left the finishings to be done in conjunction with the prospective buyer.  (I would have loved this option. The buyer gets the perks of customizing their home by selecting stains and cabinets and hardware without the stress and fear of finding big, money sucking problems because all of that has already been addressed. It also would have been a way to still make money on the flip, but not scare off/piss off potential buyers, namely myself, by paying double for some of the more cosmetic updates.) I understand not wanting to isolate a larger part of the market with very specific design selections, but this house deserved more than cookie cutter and I also think the right buyer of this house would want more for it too.  
It seemed someone must have agreed with me because maybe a week liter the listing was updated to include "working with the buyer to swap out materials."  It should be known, Tim and I decided this would have been a a perfect "country," weekend home for us to escape sans TV and Internet.  

The "Goat" House

We saw this house during a stage when we were super frustrated with our findings in our desired zip codes of 21093 and 21030.  We decided to branch out to the Glen Arm area.  Spoiler Alert: it was short lived.  It should come as no surprise that we were again smitten by the great outdoors. There was a huge pond on the property and Time quickly began to envision teaching our future future kiddos how to fish.  There was also a great pool and deck.  But the real kicker, goats!!  Sid and Nancy.  That is a bold faced lie, there names were Sugar and Cinnamon, but I would have renamed them in an instant.  I also would have put them on a diet because I think the neighborhood kids were over feeding them. Seeing how Brooks, the dog, would have reacted to Sid and Nancy would have been very interesting. Something tells me not well and it probably would have ended with him getting clocked in the face.  (Are goats that animal that buck/kick?). Aside from any potential injury, I think the encounter would have been hilarious and I desperately wish I would have turned out like this.  (An aside on goats, who knew they perfectly manicure a lawn?  Not this suburban girl.  Shame on you, Montessori.)

Sugar just hanging out in the background

I say it is the lack of powder room and being 10 miles away from a quality grocery store that were the deal breakers.  (We saw this house shortly after the Fourth of July holiday that required me to make 3 extra runs to Graul's because I had forgotten necessary ingredients.)  Metty would chalk it up to that whole deliverance vibe. You don't want me to to go into detail, but take my word for it, she was probably right.

The "Dead Man's Curve" House

This house was a part of our search when we decided to branch out and look in the city.  Many of my closest friends growing up lived in Mt. Washington and there parents still live there till this day.  It is a very diverse community with a great elementary school; both extremely important for our future caramel kids. (Insert one of my favorite Will & Grace quotes here.  Will: Yesterday you were adding milk to your mochaccino to show me what pretty colors your kids would be!)  We didn't want to buy in the city given the hefty taxes, jury duty and desire for space, but if we were going to make an exception this was the neighborhood.  Great access to restaurants and bars by foot or bike, hey despite our draw to the county we are still young, relatively, and hip, at least Tim is.  The convenience to Whole Foods was a plus too.  My favorite ice-cream shop is in Mt. Washington village.  It is both that delicious and philanthropic. (Read about it here while enjoying some honey graham or key lime ice cream.) And there is a paint your own pottery place!  Ok, I should have stopped at ice cream.  Anyway, Mt. Washington is also the most suburban of the city neighborhoods and you have a great chance at getting some, you guessed it, sizeable outdoor space.  

I wish I still had the page long list of updates and amenities that were added.  The outdoor gardens with built in barbecue, high-end fencing, basement bar complete with kegerator, doggy shower, and the list continues, but clearly these were the most appealing to me.  (I guess the new, state of the art water heater was important too). Their use of the space was impressive as well. From their pull out pantry under the stairwell to the girls bedrooms.  I thought the latter was quite ingenious in that they used the smallest bedroom as sleeping quarters for their two girls.  There were literally only two twin beds in there and there was room for nothing else.  The adjacent bedroom was more of a playroom/dressing area.  Their dressers were in there along with desks to do homework and cubbies and shelving for toys and books. The master bedroom wasn't so magical; it was too small for a king bed and given its layout/size the TV had to be mounted in the bathroom.  Creative way to problem solve, but bizarre nonetheless and definitely not going to work for us.

We were most worried about our parents, read mothers, being hesitant of visiting given the precarious 'drive-in/back-out essentially blind' driveway situation.  The listing agent assuring us that you have 3 'clear' minutes because of the light around the bend did nothing to assuage our concerns.  This is majorly flawed reasoning for so many reasons, but um hello how do you know when you are in that 3 minute window?  

The "Now This Is A Master Suite" House 

This house had a killer finished attic turned master suite.  That is really all that needs to be said, but of course I can, and will, always elaborate.  It was Tim and I's dream of a peaceful retreat incarnate.  The suite featured space for a seating area (or crib in the future), a great sized closet (although I'm sure I would have needed more room) and updated master bath complete with his and her sink.  

The "School's Out" House

This was the last of the houses in Mt. Washington we looked at.  The entrance alone, complete with sun room, and reading nooks, was a huge selling point.  In fact, throughout the home there were really great spaces to escape and decompress.  On the flip side, I think a lot of these nooks were hiding some underlying water damage. Additionally, the house was directly across the street from the Elementary School; this would be extremely convenient for our future kiddos, but it also meant dealing with insane traffic, illegally parked soccer moms, and loitering riff raff.  I'm not really sure 9 year olds can be considered riff raff, but I couldn't dispel the visions I had of the Sharks and the Jets going at it outside of our front door.  

The "Water Tower" House

We are weird in that we didn't really want neighbors.   I've never had bad neighbors per say so I'm not sure why I felt so strongly about this, other than for the plain and simple reason  I like privacy.  In fact, we really liked our neighbors when we lived in Hampden.  Well, we liked the older couple that lived to our right, but the hipsters on the other side that never mowed their lawn, we could have done without them.  I guess I answered my own question.  During the house hunt however, my mom would stress how much I would love having a side-walked neighborhood to get some fresh air especially when we had kids.  She also stressed how great it is to have neighborhood kids for play dates and carpool. (Mind you, I had 1 or 2 neighborhood friends growing up and that wasn't until I was at least in double digits so I'm not sure whose experience she is basing this off of.)   Despite my sound reasoning that, 'with kids come their parents and I like to choose my friends,' I did agree with her, as per usual, to a certain extant. Mainly the part that didn't want to be trapped in a house with a newborn and only find escape by loading up a car.  Also don't get me wrong, we like neighborhoods/developments, but the ones we like are made up of homes that each have 1-3 acres and we can't afford that.  Anyone know of a home like this?  Chez Metty and Joe maybe? 

Enough of setting the story, back to the "Water Tower" House.  Long story long, we said we would look at some more neighborhoody homes.  This house was pretty nice, nothing special, but we did like that there was a decent amount of space in between the houses where you almost had a buffer zone in your backyard.  We liked the house enough that we brought my parents back to see it and as soon as we pulled up Metty pointed out this mega water tower that somehow Tim and I missed on our previous visit.  Whoops.  

Oh Hello, Huuuge Water Tower

The "Cat" House

Not much to mention here other than her house reeked of cats and that when it comes to your reading material I am both very nosy and very judgy. This woman had a plethora of books.  Huge bonus points although I'm sure she isn't looking to me for points of any kind.  There were some great pieces of literature and not the requisite 'I know this book from high school because it is a classic and I never read it then and I still haven't', but works by Willaim Trevor and other titles I recognized from my voracious reader of a mother.  Hilary Clinton's memoir Hard Choices was spotted which erased any thoughts I was harboring as it relates to cat pee.  Tim teased me for getting up close and personal with her library, but he is definitely more aware of people's reading material these days.  You can tell a lot about someone by what they read... Or don't. (Note: Tim informed me he wants massive bookshelves in his gentleman's study.  My deadpan retort, well you are going to have to read more.  He heartily laughed and said he'd work on it, but he would also use said bookshelves for his collections styled by moi of course.  Timmy, if you are reading this, and you should be, don't think flattery will make me overlook the fact you haven't read the personally curated books I've purchased for you.  Questlove as author is totally up your alley...)

The "But It Has a Central Vac" House

Tim does not understand my infatuation with central vacs.  I mean how amazing is it not to have to empty a vacuum bag?!?  In reality, I'm sure most people have never even seen one let alone heard of them, but I thought they were commonplace growing up as my parents had a system put in when they built the house.  In turn, I pretty much think they are one of life's most underated, underused inventions.  (Yes, avocado dicer, I'm comin for ya!).  This house wasn't too memorable aside from that.  The daughter of the contractor who built the house lived there and it was super new with lots of conveniences.  I do remember it having a huge basement though. Like HUGE. Pretty sure it ran the entire length of the house.  It also sat on a decent sized lot of completely unusable land; there was a hill for the backyard and the front yard.  

The "Braverman" House 

I am obsessed with the show Parenthood.  I love being an only child, and have no desire for it to be any other way, but I am very intrigued by sibling dynamics and think this show, in all of its mushy glory, portrays them so honestly.  As soon as you stepped for inside this house, you could tell it was home to a large family.  Every nook and cranny had so much personality and was so well lived in and well loved.  Shockingly, I LOVED the outdoor space and the sun room with all the windows converted into an office.homework area.  Let me be more specific with the new, and fancy, terminology I just learned, muntins.  I LOVE muntins.  Muntins on all the windows. Muntins are those thin strips of wood separating and holding panes of glass in a window.  Killer. Especially with a fresh coat of white paint and chunky trim and molding... gah, I swoon.  

 

The listing agent shared with us that the dining room table was built out of wood reclaimed from the family's previous home.  Beyond cool.  Tim and I promptly decided we, er he, was going to build a farm table for our dining room.  It won't have the personal history, but if we go to a spot like Second Chance or The Loading Dock in Baltimore to source some reclaimed wood it will still be cool knowing it had life and a story before us.

Phew!  That was exhausting and I'm sure I've lost most, if not ALL, of you.  Let me tell you, looking at the above mentioned properties every other weekend was even more taxing, but one thing is for sure though, the journey made stumbling upon our home that much sweeter.  Onward and upward to The Yellow House!